is kissing adultery?

Where do you draw the line? I would be upset if my spouse kissed someone, but can is it adultery? Is it grounds for divorce?

I'm not sure.

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reckoner said about 3 years ago ...

hm, interesting question. I wouldn't call it adultery, and I wouldn't get divorced over it. I'm not sure what I would call it other than a betrayal of trust, but there are degrees of betrayal.

sadsack said about 3 years ago ...

I don't think it can be classified as adultery, but yes, it is a betrayal of trust as reckoner says and it will hurt like hell if a spouse does it. Divorce? Nah, I think if the marriage is strong enough, it should be able to survive a kiss( If matters stop at that), even though it'll surely rock the boat.

mgibbosh said about 3 years ago ...

Maybe they were playing tonsil tag.

starchini said about 3 years ago ...

Nah...im not sure where I draw the line...havnt been to it yet.

reckoner said about 3 years ago ...

come on, you've crossed it. You know we read your posts ;)

sean_renaud said about 3 years ago ...

Morally. Yes kissing is cheating. It's mild form but it is cheating. As Reck said unless this was a huge recurring problem I can't see ending a relationship over it but still it is cheating.

Legally, as in grounds for a divorce in states where you can't just claim irreconcilable differences? I'm not sure how I'd feel either way. Part of me wants to say I shouldn't have legal reprocussions if I kiss someone the other half of me thinks it's bullshit that there are apparently parts of the country where "I want out of the relationship" isn't legal grounds for a divorce in the first place.

So I guess it starts with figuring out what kind of conversation we're supposed to be having.

starchini said about 3 years ago ...

Now now reck, couples have all kinds of lines drawn in different places! My husband thought it was fucking amazing when he saw me and my best friend spontaneously start kissing eachother, her husband thought it was great too! So ya see, it also depends on who your kissing!

reckoner said about 3 years ago ...

that's not what i'm talking about. I recall a lot more happening on one occasion. But whatever, I don't care.

starchini said about 3 years ago ...

I know thats not what your talking about, I was just giving a random example on a the touchy line of kissing. I imagine there is a lot in my posting that people would think are crossing the line. I don't imagine most couples being ok with even one of my most recent posting with the hottub. If your talking about the two older guys I thought were trust worthy taking advantage of me...well I do think its a line crossed but not one I feel guilty about. Bringing up another good point in the topic of lines/kissing/adultery...circumstance matters a lot. If it was on purpose, if there was malicious intent, or revenge, or if it was just the perfect storm. In any case, I can't say what line was crossed until ive heard the whole story. If a kiss happened, who kissed who? What kind of kiss? Who pulled away first? Why did they kiss? Where were your hands? What was your mental state? What were you thinking? All of this sort of thing matters...

reckoner said about 3 years ago ...

she kissed under the mistletoe, in the library, with kernal mustard ;)

mgibbosh said about 3 years ago ...

whether he kissed her or she kissed him and ther actions were mutually consenting tell us one thing about our sex organs and that is they have no conscious.

wombat said about 3 years ago ...

I think kissing someone else is a betrayal, but should not be labeled as "adultry." It CAN cause a divorce, but should not be considered a reason as much as having sex should. I might think differently if I found out hubby had kissed someone, but if he found out I had kissed someone, I would go back to my origional thought.

But, really.....why would anyone kiss anyone else romantically if they were in love with their husband or wife? Caught up in the moment? There's not supposed to be those opportune moments going on, but sometimes they do, and I can see that. The one who is worried about it is supposed to pull away, but if they don't, they either want a change or wish they had not let themselves get caught up in that moment in the first place.

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