Karl Marx

First of all, Karl Marx was not Sigmund Freud. It is a popular misconception that Sigmund Freud was actually Karl Marx on cocaine, but such was not the case.

Karl Marx was an optimist. He believed that all we have to do is wait out capitalism and it will die out of its own weight and errors, and will be replaced by wonderful Marxism, a heavenly system whereby all people love each other and take care of each other. Those who are able to work will do so, and those who are not will sit home and watch tv. I am a huge fan of Marxism because I would like very much to sit home and watch tv.

I want to be a house husband. I want to have a rich wife. I don't mind doing the laundry. From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs, and I most definitely have the ability to do the laundry. What you do is you put a lot of quarters into a slot, basically, there's not much to it. I know because sometimes I go to the laundromat with my wife and she tells me what to do.

Karl Marx expected his ideas to be put into practice in his native Germany because there were so many factory workers in that nation who hated their bosses. The factory workers are not merely factory workers. They are the Proletariat. Can you say Proletariat? Pro. La. Tariat. Very good.

And as for the boss, he is a greedy fuckin capitalist. Can you say Greedy Fuckin Capitalist? Let's all try it, shall we? Greedy..... Fuckin ..... Capitalist. Very good. You are learning quickly. All those people who call you an idiot are wrong.

Karl Marx and his brothers eventually went to Hollywood and became very famous actors. His brother Groucho let it be known that he didn't mind if a country club refused admittance to Jews like himself because he wouldn't ever stoop so low as to join any club that had so little taste as to let him in.

Karl, Groucho and Zeppo starred in A Night At The Opera and Animal Crackers, which you can probably see on one of those free movie channels like the Ted Turner one. Harpo was also in them, and named himself after the talk show host Oprah Winfrey. He simply reversed the letters in Oprah and voila, Harpo.

They later changed their names to Moe, Larry and Curly and poked each other in the eyes repeatedly.

Now you know all you ever wanted to know about Karl Marx. The end.

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skald said over 3 years ago ...

Gee you did this. Thanks. I will read it right away.

skald said over 3 years ago ...

Sure can't say that word. lol You have a great sense of humor. lol Yes, and he was a Jew.

soaringraven said over 3 years ago ...

There was also a little known brother by the name of Skid, he wasn't allowed to perform with his brothers though so he set out to travel the world. In Germany he met a lovey young lady by the name of Den. After they married he bought a small farm north of Germany, kinda between Germany and Sweden. He loved his bride so much that he decided to name the farm after her, so the Farm became known as DenMarx


rollingc said over 3 years ago ...

I love these History learning discussions. You learn stuff that they don't teach you in school for fear that you'll learn too much.

scipio said over 3 years ago ...

Your "idiot's" guide to history lessons and famous personalities are fairly humourous and interesting. Short and to the point.

trinova said over 3 years ago ...

Hi, I loved this post and thanks for cluing me in about moving--it was you right? I'm getting old and forgetful.

Do you remember the Marx-Lenin button of Groucho and Lennon?

Do you know the following story: Stalin got a postcard from Trotsky which said : You are right, I was wrong. This is a revolution. Stalin was very happy and showed the postcard to all the remaining comrads he had not yet murdered. Finally, one of them spoke up (bravely). Comrade Stalin, you are not reading the card correctily. Troksky is a Jew and so you should read it this way : You are right? I am wrong? This is a revolution?

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